Malea's Hospital Birth Story

Well, here goes...first of all, I didn't want to be a mom or pregnant until I had reached about my 8th month of pregnancy.  I spent the first 7 months of my pregnancy horribly upset and depressed.  Plus, there was a HUGE mix-up around the middle of the fourth or fifth month that caused me to go without prenatal care for a period of time.  During that time I SHOULD have had my iron and glucose levels tested but no...that didn't happen until just before the eighth month.  I was so sick up to then that I literally could not get out of bed or stand up without getting dizzy and passing out...I was told that was normal morning sickness but no one I know who has experienced pregnancy has ever had morning sickness as badly or for as long as I did so I don't think it was very normal!  Well, it turned out I was so sick because I had ZERO iron in my blood!!!!!  I was taking prenatal vitamins but not extra iron...no one told me I'd need it and it turns out that's why I was so sick!

Also due to the mix-up with insurance -- which took several weeks, hours on the phone every day and lots of crying to get straightened out -- I got stuck taking a three hour lamaze class that was meant for people who had already been through pregnancy and had an idea of what to expect!  I had initially wanted to take a Bradley class that was supposed to be much longer and very in-depth and intense.

During my last month of pregnancy I began to research and put together my birth-plan.  I finally had it finished and gave it to the mid-wife at the clinic I was going to.  She looked it over and said it was one of the most thorough and well put together birth plans she had ever seen.  Copies were made for my file, for her records, for myself to keep and for the hospital's records.  I WANTED medication and an epiesiotomy (sp?) and I did NOT want visitors...I was very explicit on what I wanted and when and how...  We also
talked about how I would use visualization and meditation to deal with the
pain as I have used such methods to successfully deal with pain in the past.

Well, according to my ultrasound my son was to be born August 24th, 1998. My mid-wife told me that wouldn't happen, they always come later and to expect him September 2nd at the EARLIEST.  On August 23rd my back was bothering me all day and I just felt tired and out of sorts.  At 5:25am I woke up with sharp pains in my abdomen.  My husband was already in the shower getting ready for work when I knocked on the bathroom door.

I sat on the couch and called my sister while I waited for John to get dressed.  My sister agreed with me that I was starting labor so I called the midwives clinic.  The midwife who answered told me not to worry that I probably wouldn't deliver for at least a few days and to stay put and she'd see me at my regular appoinmtent later that day.  I tried repeatedly to tell her that my son was on his way but she kept refusing to listen.

Finally I hung up and John helped me take a shower and get dressed.  We drove over the hospital with the pain intensifying and the contractions getting closer and closer together on the short drive.  When I got there, around 6:30am or so, they tried to send me home without examining me!  We convinced them that I needed to be there and they kept saying things like
"Well, we get women every day who think they are in labor but it's almost always a false alarm."  They examined me anyway and said I was at 1cm and that I would have to go home and come back later...I said NO WAY and they told me to walk around for an hour but that they'd probably just send me home then.

So, John and I walked around for about thirty minutes when I suddenly felt like I was going to loose control of my bowels and we practically ran back into the hospital and up to the maternity ward.  I went to the bathroom and they re-examined me and said they'd never seen anyone go from 1cm to 6cm so fast and agreed to admit me.  An epidural and other IV's were started right away.  The epidural needle was stuck over to one side though so much so that the entire right side of my body went numb and the medication had zero effect on the left side...

After a few hours and a nap my body was telling me to push and the midwives were telling me NOT to push...finally they said to push and I did but nothing was happening.  Oh, they had to break my water too since it didn't happen on it's own.  When nothing continued to happen they examined me further and said my son's head was tilted just enough to the side to prevent him from being able to come out.  One of the midwives had to put her hand inside me and move his head.  It was very painful.

The entire thing was very painful actually!  I knew it would all hurt but I had no idea it would be that bad!  I was screaming, grunting, groaning and at one point hyperventilated and nearly passed out.

One of the midwives thought I needed more medication which is what I wanted and she had agreed to do an epiesiotomy which I also wanted.  The woman who was senior to her, however, kept insisting that I didn't need any more medication and that I did not need an epiesiotomy and would not tear...  So, I was in excruciating pain and even John thought so and he had seen four births with his ex-wife including a natural birth.  John told the midwives that I was in more pain than his ex-wife had ever experienced and she had NO MEDICATIONS.  They still wouldn't give me anything more.

When my son was finally born I had four major tears and several smaller ones.  Generally women tear towards their rear but two of my tears went out to the side and one went quite far forward, so much so that it was more than just painful to urinate!  I thought it might sting a bit to use the toilet but this was torture!  Then, the midwife who did the stitches did some of them wrong and got a fold of tissue in there where it shouldn't be so now I have a very weird scar that took a very long time to heal.  She was the same woman who told me I wouldn't tear at all!

During my visits to the clinic before my son's birth I had been gauranteed that he would be placed on my stomach immediately after he was born and that they would cut the cord and everything right there.  They also told me that they would let him sit there for a few minutes so we could bond before they cleaned him up.  Well, what really happened is that they rushed him to the other side of the room without even showing him to John or myself.  He was totally fine so it is a mystery why they did this.  They gathered around him and cleaned him up and everything and took their sweet time (over half an hour) before even allowing me to see him...

Then, when it came time to nurse him they kept telling me I had to change his position because THEY couldn't see well enough!  Well, the position they wanted me to use was extremely uncomfortable for me and he couldn't latch on very well...it was awful and so I left the hospital a full day early just to be done with it!  It was terrible and I tell everyone I meet who plans on having a baby that they should not go to that clinic or that hospital!

Not one thing went the way I was told it would go...it was a huge dissapointment and felt like a nightmare!  More children are born at this hospital than all the other hospitals in our state combined every year so I wonder how they could be so horrible, or maybe that's why it was so awful....?

Malea
Email: [email protected]

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